Sunday, April 1, 2012

Gollum on The Clone Wars: Brothers

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS. 
Gollum is a guide of the lands north and west of Mordor and an informant for multiple powers in Middle-Earth.  He is a fishing enthusiast and a skilled waterman, this feat being recognized by King Elessar himself.  When he is not fishing or searching for his precious, Gollum enjoys inventing riddles.

You didn't think we watched The Clone Wars, did you, precious?  Yes, yes, we watch it.  The wizard, the one who interrogates poor Sméagol [Gandalf], we heard that in some video games he is voiced by Tom Kane, who plays Yoda, yes?

What?  Noooo, don't hurt poor Sméagol for breaking the...hm?  The "fourth wall"?  What's the "fourth wall," eh?

The short blogger wanted us to write this before because the episode reminded her of us, precious.  Mmm, it reminds her very much of us.  But we are getting ahead of ourselves.

Sméagol had a nice time watching this episode.  It wasn't our favourite, but we likes it much better than watching the fat hobbit in our movies.

This episode finally has Darth Maul in it.  The short blogger doesn't understand why he is not dead.  Sméagol understands.  Where we come from, many come back to life, yes they do, precious.  Like Wraiths, and the Eye, and the wizard, yes, they all came back once.  But they have magic.  Does Darth Maul have magic, precious?  We doesn't know.  It could have come back with dark magic, or maybe it just doesn't need it's bottom half.

For so many long years, Darth Maul was living in this strange place.  We lived in a cave for a very long time too.  Much longer than it did.  But we are not as crazy, are we, precious?  We wonders what made it insane.  Hate?  Yes, yes, that may be.  It hates the Jedi who took Darth Maul's legs and its position.  Just like we hates Baggins.  He stole our precious!  We hates it!  Hates it!  Forever!  AHHHHH!

Mm, yes, we will go on.

We thought the episode would be good joined with the next one, mmm, or having more story included.  Many of the scenes added something, yes, but didn't amount to much.  But Sméagol is patient and still enjoys it.

Sméagol likes the snake.  It is funny.  We would like someone to bring us things to eat like it does.  Nice rabbits and crunchable birdses!  We are tired of orcses.  And we would like a friend.  Yes, Sméagol would like a friend.

The fat hobbit doesn't count.

That is all we have to say.  We liked the episode, but not as much as the Mon Calamari arc.  Lots of fishess in those, yes precious!  May the precioussss be with you!

10 comments:

  1. I love it! Brilliant! Star Wars and Lord of the Rings are two favorite movies! :D This was great, Gollum is one of my favorite chracters in LOTR. Maul also reminded me of Gollum, I thought he was about to say "My precioussss!". I am glad you are back. Your captions above your fish buttons are hilarious! Great post!

    -James

    -James

    ReplyDelete
  2. Messa agree with Smeagol. It was a good episode. And I should've know that Smeagol would like the snake.

    And You Better not hurt Arda's ObiWan!!! Or we'll both come after you!! And I'll have the elves with me and Arda the jedi!!!! I'm watching you Smeagol!!*Does that eye motion thing*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Never! Sméagol wouldn't hurt a fly! Don't hurt poor Sméagol! Nasty elveses and jedises...

      Delete
  3. THAT WAS THE BEST POST EVERRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!

    I also see how you have gone Gollum-crazy across the blog xD

    Anyway, that was genius. Made my day <3

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks so much James and The Director! I really appreciate your comments. It's great to know that people enjoy my writing. :)

    The Director - yeah, SOMEONE hacked my account and took over my blog. ;P)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Eh heh. And look, you're back! :P

      Delete
    2. Haha yeah, since you and James were talking to me instead of Gollum, I figured it would be good to post as myself. ;)

      Delete
  5. That was amazing :)
    I tagged you on my blog!

    ~Nessima of Arda Nessimava

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Nessima! :D I'll try to answer your questions sometime!

      Delete
  6. Gollum, please tell Arda thanks she won the Lord of the Rings trivia challenge.

    http://jandjproductions1809.blogspot.com/2012/04/lord-of-rings-trivia-quiz-answers.html

    -James

    ReplyDelete